I am awake

Today I am reminded that not everyone wins, not everyone survives...i dreamt that i was pregnant and lost a baby again. So i woke up this morning feeling sad and bothered. I couldn't quite shake off the feeling inspite of knowing it was just a terrible dream. As i check my phone and scroll down fb, i see sherwin's post. His sister, darlene, is already gone :(  She fought, conquered, fought again, but lost. I am now scared because i know i haven't been getting enough rest, keep on consuming crap, and lack exercise. I keep on telling myself that i'll start "tomorrow" but then days turned into months. This is most certainly a wake up call that I will not resist.